National pimp your husband day

Yeah. Okay, that's not a real day. But it should be!

[Side note: I went through this phase where I would dissect funny phrases - for example: This is funny because by "pimp" I mean I'm trying to help him get a job -- BUT the type of job implied is inappropriate, and inappropriate things are funny]

[Other Side Note: Normally, copying and pasting from Red Bubble is a horrible and plageristic idea, but in this case I'm showcasing the designer and I, also, live with him, so it's okay]

Forgive me for not blogging Numbers again today. Feeling a little under the weather. And I have to work in the morning. And the other day, I tried to stay up late and blog [and I did] - but then I overslept and ended up being an hour late to my cleaning gig. :( My friend, whom I clean for, was SUPER nice about it. But, still, I felt bad.

So, nothing but a short pimping blog tonight.

This blog was inspired by Mr. Rob Bell [shocking, right?]. I was at Borders Books today, and I began to read through Drops Like Stars. I got to page 43. That's not important but I wanted to share.

He tells a story of an AWESOME college essay submitted to NYU by this guy named Hugh Gallagher. Bell says that we call people who do things like this the type to "think outside the box". But there's a problem, because simply by using that phrase we are admitting that the box is still the main frame of reference. Bell says that folks like Gallagher stand out because they change the question.

They ask,"There's a box?"

I've been reading about all kinds of people who asked this question in order to get a job in these troubled times. This article by CNNmoney.com is supercalafragalistic and very helpful.

Jamie Varon, founder of Shatterbxox Media, tried and applied to Twitter but was found wanting. So, she created twittershouldhireme.com. Within 24 hours of the website's debut, Twitter was on the phone.

Ahem, SO, this is my attempt to question the Great Big Box and perhaps help my humble husband get a job. I must add, though, he is one of the great "There's a box?" askers. If you attended our wedding [or saw the pictures], you already know that.

Hmm. Where should I start? Incredible aspiring graphic designer? Check [here and here]. Talented and hilarious writer? Check [here]. Ridiculously gifted musician? CHECK [he is no longer with the band, but you can go here to get a feel for what he does].

The term "artsy" doesn't even begin to describe him. And, he may be one of the funniest guys I've ever met in my life. Oh! And as if all that wasn't enough, he's building a computer from scratch [and blogging about it here]!

One more thing. We're both sick right now. And I must say, he's taking far better care of me than I am of him. He would get mad props anyway because I am a great big baby when I'm ill - but put up with me and a bad head cold - that's a God thing right there.

Okay, I lied - four more things. He just started two volunteer gigs with Cedar Ridge [our church] - the first helping CRCC build a better website and the second with all things Middle School [ooh - he's got some serious experience in this area because he and his cousin Dwayne [the one with the awesome dreads from the last blog] led CounterCulture - the youth group at Wheaton Woods Baptist Church for 2 years]. To top it all off, he does a mean dramatic reading.

Also, he's an educated fool. With an Associates degree from Montgomery college, he moonlights as a full time IT student at the University of Phoenix.

He's really good at helping me carry out my crazy plans. We put on a week of 24-7 prayer together at WWBC. He became the only non-student member of the organization I founded at MC to help raise awareness and help the victims of the genocide in Darfur. And he graciously lets me decorate the apartment however I want no matter how much he dislikes it [as long as I don't mind that he dislikes it].

He's one peaceful, nurturing funky dude who knows how to par-tay [except he doesn't like the taste of alcohol - but he makes a topnotch DD]. I'm hard-pressed to think of one person who doesn't like him.

Oh, and of course, you can follow him on Twitter. Like I said, he's a very funny guy.

He got laid off last April. It's been an exciting and scary ride. He's amazing - full of hope and faith in God. I'm, er, learning. Struggling. Wrestling. But, when it's all said and done, I think this could be the beginning of something beautiful.

Once again, thank you for reading my blog. And, just so you know, - and this not a bribe - but, if you help get Jermaine a job, there's a good chance I'll feel a strong desire to bake you brownies. And kiss you. Unless you don't want me to. Then I won't. Because that would be weird.

Just joshing. G'night. ;)

The art of the sermon

No Bible blog tonight. I'm beat.

I've been wanting to share these videos for a while now. Zach Lind, drummer for Jimmy Eat World, interviews Rob Bell. As this is the third time I've posted a Rob Bell video, you may be starting to get tired of him. I'm not, so, sorry. ;)

Rob Bell Interview, Part 2 from Zach Lind on Vimeo.

The video is broken into three parts. This is the 2nd one, it's the last one I watched. I don't know why I watched them out of order, but I don't think you necessarily need to watch them in order [although, it is one long interview, chopped up into 3 10-20 minutes sound bites, so you may disagree]. If you can't bring yourself to watch the 2nd before the first, then you can go here and watch them in order.

Ooh, I remember now why I watched them the way I did! The last one is titled, "Zach asks Rob about his current topics of interest. Rob regrets something he said." I watched it first because I wanted to see what he regretted. At the end of that video he says something to the effect of, "Ooh, I wish I hadn't used the phrase "chopping the balls off the sermon". I thought it was strange because I didn't hear him say he was chopping the balls off of a sermon. And I thought I would have noticed that. After that, I started at the beginning, watching #1, and finally, I finished off with #2. Oddly enough, it is this video, #2, where he uses that salty phrase. Alas.

I really liked listening to the dialogue between the two guys. And the sermon as performance art [which they talk about late in this video], I love that. I love grenades in that setting [you may have to watch the video to make sense of these sentences]. I hope and pray I get to do that someday. Along with that, I pray for a dose of humility - and for God's will. This desire I feel to teach and preach and play with sermons, I think it's a God thing. But I pray to pray for God's will, even if it is not what I want.

Anyhow, enjoy! And thank you for reading my blog!

Numbers 4:1 - 8:26

Good gracious, I'm sleepy. But a promise is a promise. So let's get down with our bad selves.

Chapter 4 - God goes more in depth regarding the Levite clans and what they're supposed to carry. The Kohathites get the most holy things. The Gershonites "carry the burdens" - the curtain, the actual Tent of Meeting and the outer covering. The Merarites carry the frames, the crossbars, the pots and bases, and finally, the surrounding posts. Chapter 5 - We start out with some instructions on purity - specifically, who should be removed from the camp so that it will not be defiled. Next - a little excerpt on when to make restitution for wrongs. And finally, a detailed test to figure out whether or not a woman has been unfaithful to her husband [in the absence of evidence]. It involves drinking bitter water. Essentially if the woman is innocent, the cursed water won't harm her. If she's guilty, her abdomen will swell and she will become barren. Chapter 6 - The Nazirite! If an Israelite wants to make a special vow of separation to the Lord, he or she is not to drink wine or eat ANY part of a grape for the duration of the vow. Also, he or she is not to cut his [or her] hair [during that time]. The chapter ends with a priestly blessing for the Israelites. Chapter 7 - The 12 tribes bring their offerings to the Tabernacle. Chapter 8 - Aaron sets up the lamps and God tells Moses how to set the Levites apart.

I think I like more detailed version better than the bite-sized Skinny I did in my last blog. And 6 pages seems just right. Mhmm. :)

Things that got my goat

I wonder if the Gershonites or the Merarites were ever jealous of the Kohathites for getting to carry the most holy things. And, I wonder if the other Israelites ever resented the Levites for being set apart by God. Ooooor, I wonder if the Levites ever felt like they got the shaft because they didn't get to own land. Also, they didn't exactly get to pick their occupation. But, then again, I don't suppose many people got to pick the profession back in those days.

As you can probably imagine, I raised an eyebrow or two while reading about the test for an unfaithful wife. A couple of things to note: this was a way of protecting the woman - a man couldn't just decide that his wife had cheated and demand that she pay. And, apparently, tests similar in nature were common back then - and this one was incredibly more kind than the others.

I'd like to think if I lived while all of this was going down I would have attempted to become a Nazirite. I think it's really cool that women were allowed in on this special vow. Fun facts: Rastafarians take Nazarine vows - thus, the dreadlocks - that way they can grow their hair long without scissors, brushes, etc. I think the Bible describes Samson [a Nazirite we read about later] as having dreadlocks. The picture at the top is of my cousin-in-law and roommate, Dwayne - he has some really awesome dreads! Um, it's too late to get permission to use that photo, so I'm just going to throw it up there and ask in the morning. If you're reading this, and there's no picture at the top, you know he's a stingy jerk. Just sayin' . . . :P

Holy scmoly. I'm done! Purty cool. Off to bed - early morning!

Tomorrow we'll cover: Numbers 9:1 -14:45.

Leviticus 26:1-Numbers 3:51

I do not feel like blogging tonight. I did something to my back [probably while hiking yesterday] and I'm plagued with a general sense of yuckiness.

But, the thing is, everyday it seems I can find another reason not to blog. :(

I'm tired.

It's late.

Criminal Minds is on.

I have to clean my room.

My nose itches.

So, you know what? Screw faulty reasoning. Let's do it! Here we go!

Chapter 26 - Promises and warnings. Chapter 27 - Giving the first fruits, the firstborn and the tithe. Chapter 1 - The census. Chapter 2 - The arrangement of the tribal camps. Chapter 3 - The Levites get assigned specific tasks according to their tribes.

Wow. This changes this quite a bit. That is one skinny skinny!

Since it is so short, I'm going to try to break it down chapter by chapter [for this blog, at least - let me know what you think!].

Promises - The magic word here is "if". If they obey, God will dwell with them just as it was in the Garden of Eden.

Also, in the Five Books of Moses, Robert Alter notes verse 10 - the NIV puts it this way - "You will still be eating last year's harvest when you will have to move it out to make room for the new."

Alter's translation - " And you will eat old grain long stored, and you will clear out the old for the new."

The "old grain long stored", according to Alter, is a key reference to the importance of keeping the Sabbath year. I once heard Rob Bell say [something to this effect] that the idea of rest for the land is simply "farming 101". It's essential. God, evidently, built it into the very fabric of our being.

Curses - 7 curses. And the phrase "7 times over" keeps popping up. And it's bad. It's read bad. Nelson's Quick Reference Chapter by Chapter Bible Commentary explains, "Enjoying the gifts while insulting the Giver is both selfish and idolatrous. We should obey God, not to "deserve" His blessings or even to avoid His chastenings, but to show our love to Him and our desire to please His heart."

After all the curses are said and done, God concludes with one more "if". Even after all the depravity, if they confess their sins, they will be forgiven. And though they will still have to face the consequences of their actions, God will be with them once again.

Hmmmm. If this is what "breaking it down chapter by chapter" looks like, I'm not going to be able to do that. Let's go back to highlighting. ;)

I want to dive into the beginning of chapter 27. Because reading it made me sad. Simply put, it says that men are worth more than women. The Women's Bible Commentary [edited by Carol A. Newsom and Sharon H. Ringe] offered me the only commentary I could find on this passage [though I'm sure there is probably much more]. Judith Romney Wegner wrote the commentary for Leviticus and she explains that these numbers related to a person's level of economic productivity according to their sex and age. She also notes, and I think rightly so, that the priests who came up with these numbers failed to factor in the economic benefits of child-rearing, care-taking, and housekeeping.

I think she is definitely on to something, but the thing is, God dictated these numbers to Moses. And I know God is not underestimating the value of women in society. So what gives?

Numbers is called Numbers because, well, it contains a lot of numbers. Specifically, I'm talking about the census at the beginning [and the end, which we'll talk about later]. It should be noted that this is a military census - all men over 20 fit to fight.

603,550. That's a LOT of people. There is some speculation about this. The Zondervan Handbook to the Bible notes that including women and children the Israelites would total 2-3 million. Buuut, also, the total could be a scribal error. The word "thousand" should possibly be interpreted "troop". Or/and that even today we use large numbers figuratively to describe "a lot of people".

Okay, last but not least, I thought it was interesting [but not surprising] that the Levites were given specific tasks. Something about the idea of God thinking of everything is a little bit thrilling to me. :)

Hmm. I think this ended up being somewhat shorter. I had a lot more time for commenting, that's for sure. And, actually, I finished in about a third of the time it usually takes me.

Sweet! Happy reading!

Tomorrow's [and yes, I do mean tomorrow] reading: Numbers 4:1 - 8:26. Wow- doesn't it seem so much easier and shorter this way?? Yay God!

Prayer and blogging

Hi there!

[Editor's Note: This picture has absolutely nothing to do with this blog. I just thought it was adorable.]

Terribly sorry for the blogging hiatus. I promise I haven't given up. Cross my heart.

I think I have to admit it, tho. The 90 day plan may be too much. And, school hasn't even started yet!

So, I'm plotting. Planning. And praying [well, honestly, this whole blog has been seriously lacking in the prayer department [as least on my part] - so I'm devoting some time on my knees in the very near future]. Ooh - your prayers would be much appreciated! Requesting prayers regarding glory. Namely, that this blog will be for God's glory and not mine. And for forgiveness and mercy. Because I tend to be a glory hog.

A few other prayer needs:

• Strength to keep going, if continuing is God's will
• Discernment to know whether or not it is
  
• Wisdom and accuracy
  
• That this blog will bless others in ways I can't begin to imagine
• Um, and anything else that you think will help

Writing is so wonderfully organic. I didn't plan on asking for prayer until I started in on this blog entry. It all just came out. And it seems pretty obvious that prayer is exactly what I need right now.

I'm thinking about cutting my blogs in half. So, instead of 12 pages, we'd do 6. It would mean shorter blogs [which I like] and a longer time-frame [which I'm not so sure about - I'm warming up to the idea, tho]. Plus, I can dive into a few of the details that are being missed right now.

I'm also loosely throwing around the idea of a day to read and a day to blog. That would lengthen this project by about a year. But, overall, might be more helpful to more people.

I'm [very] slowly learning how to make my blog shine. I'm not what you'd call "computer-savvy" [some might hesitate to call me "computer-literate"] so, the extra time could help the cultivation process tremendously.

As always, comments are warmly encouraged. :)

If I do make this a longer project, I'll free up some time for submitting articles to magazines and working on my two other blogs [The chronicles of not enough and Confessions of an out of shape aerobics instructor]. Because up until now the plan has been to finish this project before even thinking about those.

One more thing. I'm attempting a slightly more scholarly approach. I'm keeping my quirky flavor, but I checked out 10 or so biblical commentaries from the library. One of the things I'm working on in my life right now is to hone my research skills [which, sadly, even tho I'm entering my senior year of undergrad, leave a lot to be desired]. I thought, what better opportunity than this?

Mostly this means instead of typing, "I think I heard somewhere . . . ", I'll actually look it up. ;)

Well folks, it's officially way too late again. Time to dive under my covers and dream about horrible things [ugh, while cleaning my room - I watched, like, 4 or more hours of crime shows - there should be some sort of cut off! I'm afraid to close my eyes].

Hmm, maybe I should pray about that, too . . .

G-'night!

The sticky part of Leviticus

A river of blood

[Editor's Note: If you are short on time, then, by all means, skip the reading part and just watch the video below. It's what goosebumps are all about [even if we haven't gotten to that part of Leviticus yet!]

I heard a pastor once describe the foot of the altar this way [a river of blood]. I think he [or she] may have been talking about the one at the temple, but either way it struck a chord in me and I thought I'd use this imagery to wake up Leviticus.

Oh, Leviticus. Dear boring, irrelevant Leviticus. I know I'm supposed to be helping you get through the dull bits [as Jermaine so kindly pointed out while I was whining about this blog earlier]. A sizable part of me wants to say, "I'm sorry, it turns out Leviticus really does just suck too much. Whadaya say we call it a day and try again tomorrow?"

I have a cheat sheet. A wonderful explanation of the key points given by James-Michael [of course]. But, sigh. I'm not the most organized person, so needless to say, I've lost it. I'll try to dig it up tomorrow. For now, I'll aim to wing it.

The Skinny:

Chapter 1 - Details on the Burnt Offering. Chapter 2 - Details on the the Grain Offering. Chapter 3 - Details on the Peace [or Fellowship] Offering. Chapter 4 - Details on the Sin Offering. We learn that even if a person sins unintentionally, there are still consequences and punishments [and restitution must still be made]. Chapter 5 - More details about the Sin Offering and an explanation of the Guilt Offering. Chapter 6 - More on the Guilt Offering. Then what the priests are supposed to do with all these offerings. Chapter 7 - More on that. Also, no eating fat or blood. And an excerpt about the priest's share. Chapter 8 - The Ordination of Aaron and his sons. Chapter 9 - They begin their ministry. Chapter 10 - Aaron's sons screw up and are killed in the presence of the Lord. Moses appoints Mishael and Elzaphan [their cousins] to take their place. Aaron is not allowed to mourn but his family is. There is a dispute about why they didn't eat the sin offering and Moses is angry. But Aaron explains that he couldn't after what just happened and Moses is satisfied [I think that's the way it went, at least]. Chapter 11 - Instructions on clean and unclean animals for food. Chapter 12 - How long until you can be clean after giving birth. Chapter 13 - A lengthy passage about infectious diseases and then about mildew. Chapter 14 - How to be cleansed from infectious diseases, and then, of course, mildew, too.

I found this AMAZING video on You Tube. I originally planned on saving it until tomorrow. As you can see, it's called Leviticus 20:13, and we're not quite there yet. But I just couldn't wait! It's so poignant and powerful. A must see, for sure.



Okay, getting back to the river of blood. There was a point to that wake up call. The pastor [whom I can't remember but who deserves full credit for the following thought] spoke about sin. Sin [a very simplistic definition of sin: going against God's will] is like an infectious disease. It starts out small, but it leads to death. So it must be atoned for. With blood.

So picture the temple in Jesus's day. Loud and bustling. People everywhere. Coming in and going out. And all the while there's this steady flow of animal blood meandering throughout. From the altar to the gate. Constant.

Leviticus is the beginning of all of that. And Jesus, as you may have guessed, is the culmination. The final atonement.

Frankly, it's bizarre. And compelling. All those dead animals. They didn't work. The whole idea was to repent. To sacrifice. And to sin no more. But we didn't get it.

So we got a river of blood.


A note about Aaron and his sons

Wow. Wait, what? God killed them because they burned incense in the wrong way?

What??

And Aaron was not allowed to mourn [that's what the reference to unkempt hair and tearing of the clothes was all about].

It says, he "remained silent." [10:3b]

Because when something like that happens, words fail.

And, again, God's anger is overwhelming. It seems like too much to swallow.

But you know what strikes me? They could have left it out. They could have left all of the parts out that made God look like a bully on a power trip. They could have left the ones out where the Israelites whined endlessly.

[By "they", I mean, our Jewish fathers who compiled the Torah and the Hebrew Bible]

But they didn't. And, gosh, you can't make this stuff up [well, actually, I suppose you could - but why would you want to?].

I've heard Leviticus described as a Big Book of Instruction for priests. The Levites were held to extremely high esteem because they were to be the priests. And once again, they weren't chosen on their merit, they were just ordinary people. And they messed up.

But the stakes were a lot higher. God needed to show these people how important this was to him.

And what is interesting is that, right now, at this very moment, we [those of us who call ourselves Christian] are called to be a kingdom of priests.

But we're just ordinary people. And we get it wrong a lot. And the stakes are still high. Different, but high. And that's exciting! And terrifying!

Because there is so much on the line.

Tomorrow's reading: Leviticus 15:1 - 25:55.

Funny spot for a sign . . .

We interrupt this regularly scheduled Bible blog to bring you this interesting video.

Drops Like Stars Tour. Oh, get excited. Get excited. Rob Bell is coming to DC [October 10th 2009].

Finally: Day 7!

What can I say? I've missed you guys. It's been a long awkward pause. I loved being gone. Visiting my hometown and loving my long lost family members.

But still, it's good to be back in Merryland. I missed my dog. ;)

The Skinny:

Chapter 29 - God tells Moses how to consecrate Aaron and his sons. It's gross. Chapter 30 - More instruction - the Altar of Incense, Money from men once they come of age, Basin for washing, Anointing Oil and Incense [fabulous holy perfume]. Chapter 31 - God calls these two guys out, Bezalel and Oholiab - the Spirit of God shows up for the first time, and instruction on the Sabbath. Chapter 32 - A horrible scene involving a golden calf. Chapter 33 - God is so mad he tells the people to go ahead to the promised land, but that he's not coming, because they're a "stiff-necked" people and if he comes he'll probably end up killing them all. Moses has this unique and bold dialogue with the Lord and talks him into coming. Chapter 34 - New stone tablets with the laws because Moses broke the first ones during the golden calf incident. Moses's face begins to radiate from spending so much time with God. Chapter 35-40 - Stuff starts to happen just as God commanded, beginning with the Sabbath. People give so much, it ends up being too much! Finally Moses inspects everything. And the Glory of God covers the Tent of Meeting. God dwells with his people. When the cloud leaves [or fire], the people know it's time to follow.

Ai. Not a bad attempt at making The Skinny skinnier. I'm really thankful and surprised to find myself this far along on this blog already. You know, you put something off for long enough and it becomes a monster of a task. It's only 1:15am! And that, by my standards, is early. :)

Plus, I always, the following is the fun part for me. Once I get here, I always feel confident I can finish.

Okay! Let's get right into the good stuff.

The Holy Spirit makes an entrance

I love firsts. My first puppy. My first kiss. The first [and only as of right now] time I gave birth. Sadie's first steps. These events really get me all choked up. So, obviously, I took notice when I first discovered this first [I think James-Michael told us in Bible study]. What's even more interesting is who gets to be filled - artists! You know, the dreamy type that can often be found doing something that, on the surface, seems trivial, fruitless, unproductive - yeah, them! They get God's wisdom, understanding, and ability in every craft. Loooove it!

A word about detail

This stuff seems so boooring, right? What the heck is the point? I think I got this one [er, well, How to Read the Bible Book by Book has this one, anyhow]. One of the unique attributes about this Hebrew God is that he dwells with his people. And he is telling them how to make his throne. One of the Big Deals is that God's throne is in a tent! Not only is it modest [as compared to a temple], it's mobile! God goes with his people. He leads them. He interacts with them. This is HUGE.

I think the details and the beauty have something to do with what I call Extravagant Love [other people may call it this, I'm sure I didn't coin the term]. All the fuss. It's important. And necessary. There's a great example in the Gospels, where the woman comes and pours perfume on Jesus's feet. His disciples don't get it. They think it's a waste. He does, though. And he is moved by her gift of Extravagant Love [it also has something to do with this holy incense and oil business, I believe].

While my daughter was away I promised her I'd send her cookies. Days passed and for whatever reason, the cookies didn't get sent [I made a batch and they went bad before I could send them]. So I finally finished a second batch. I decorated the big ones with her favorite frosting and added sprinkles because I know she loves them. I went to the post office to send them. I had to overnight them so they'd get to her on time [before she came back to Maryland!]. It ended up costing $25. $25! We don't have that! I thought about it while I stood in line. Should I do this? It seemed almost ridiculously wrong. But, deep down in my gut I felt this tug toward Extravagant Love. Yes, it was silly. But I don't get the opportunity to love like this everyday. And so I plunged into the silliness for Love's sake.

Well, it ended up becoming somewhat of a nightmare for my dad, who had to drive all over town looking for the post office that they'd been shipped to the next day. It made him late picking Sadie up [and frazzled]! And some of the cookies broke and stuck together - even the tin broke! I felt so bad, second guessing myself - feeling foolish.

Then, my mom, who would have ordinarily gasped in horror at the amount I spent to mail cookies, lovingly offered to pay for them. And so, a Cookie Near Fiasco turned into two different opportunities for Extravagant Love.

The golden calf

Oh my. This story is bad on so many levels. I think I'm only going to focus on one. Because I've read this story many many times, and this time around, what struck me the most was not the people's disobedience, but God's [and Moses's] anger. Because I live in a world where I'm taught that God is loving, and kind, and forgiving. And because shortly after this whole horrible scene, we have God's "self-revelation" proclaiming that he is indeed all of these things. Right after all these people were killed [by the swords of the people who are "for the Lord"].

And I get it. Well, no, I don't actually. But, I get it intellectually. I get that the whole construction of the calf thing is just screaming a lack of faith. I get that what God was telling Moses on that mountain was extremely important and that they ended up doing one of the very things God explicitly told them not to - and additionally, it was the very first thing he warned against. I get that we were made to worship God and that we end up in terrible danger when we put our faith in anything other than God.

I get it - I do! But, still, the punishment seems so . . . harsh. And, honestly, it scares me. Because I'm quite sure I could have done something equally as bad, if I haven't done it already. And just how do you reconcile with the God of the Old Testament? I want to. I really do. But, honestly, this is where I am on my journey at the moment - and I think it's a good place to be - wrestling with God over these difficult things. I'll let you know if I get any leads. And please, feel free to share your wisdom with me! Especially via comment. :)

The Sabbath

There is so much to say here. But, in an effort to try to keep this blog short[er] I won't even attempt to say it all. I do want to encourage you to research and practice the Sabbath. I don't, I must confess. I have tried/am trying. I have a deep conviction that there is a rhythm to all of our lives, and that a day of rest has been intricately woven into the fabric of this rhythm and, therefore is unquestionably important. I am working on this. And repenting my ludicrous busyness for the sake of arbitrary accomplishment. I am not implying that this is your struggle, too. But I believe in my heart that if we all practiced the Sabbath [though I think it could possibly look different to each person], we'd be doing some of that bringing heaven to earth stuff Jesus was talking about.

Good night, lovely reader. Thank you for reading from the bottom of my heart.

Tomorrow's reading: Leviticus 1:1 - 14:57. We've finished two books!

A Blog About A Blog

Sigh. It's 12:22. I haven't finished the reading for day 7. If I attempted to blog tonight I'd be up until 4am or later. If I wasn't in Pennsylvania, I'd consider it. But, here, it seems, I'm running on my parents timeline. And their schedule definitely doesn't include blogging into the early hours. I'll likely get a wake up call at 7am. And no one wants to encounter me on 3 hours of sleep.

So, I haven't blogged in 3 days. I thought I'd be able to do it on vacation. I thought wrong.

I want you to know, tho, I'm not giving up. It may take me a little longer than I originally anticipated, but, so be it. Sometimes it's more important for me to play Candyland with Baby Sadie or cuddle with Jermaine than it is to blog. I think that's the good stuff - the marrow sucking, if you will.

I have to tell you, it's a lot harder than I thought it'd be. It's a breeze to shoot out a blog like this - and I'm thankful to this project for helping me realize that! When I finish, I'll be able to brandy-wine blog like it's going out of style.

With this blog, I have to read A LOT [I mean, obviously]. And then research the stuff I just read, and then, write it all out [and agonize how it's so long that no one's going to read it].

I'm not complaining. Actually, I love it! I feel like it's this adventure I get to be a part of - it's exciting! I'm really just phishing for comments. They make it all worth it! And I changed the settings so that you can leave a comment even if you don't have a blog [or, you should be able to, let me know if you have trouble].

So this, as it turns out, is a blog about not blogging. I'm going to make an effort to blog [about not blogging] whenever it happens that I can't get through whatever day I'm on. That way, you'll still have something fun to read [or look at, or watch]. And if you're following along, you get a break from all that reading! Or you can get ahead of me and sit back and scoff at how far behind I am. ;)

I tried posting a video of the Young @ Heart [http://www.youngatheartchorus.com/] Trailer for you to watch - I really really really want to see it! But it wouldn't work - technical difficulties. I'm frustated now. And tired. And Ornery - which is Jermaine's new favorite word [it's a pretty funny word]. I posted some photos of my hometown instead. It's good to be back.

So, good night, Blogland. We shall meet again, soon [perhaps not too soon on the biblical front - I may not post a Bible entry until I get back to Maryland on Wednesday - I'll keep you posted [no pun intended]].

No intensely long blog tonight. My parents brought Sadie back today, and I'm just too excited!

You may have noticed, I've added some stuff - things you can play with! I can't wait to see your reactions [check out the bottom of every blog].

I'm trying to get more people to read my blog - and I ran across Seth's Blog on how to do just that. I'm learning [slowly but surely] how to use sites like Technorati, del.ico.us. and digg. If you can think of a way to explain it to me like I'm a 7 year old - please, let me know! Technology is not one of my strengths [yet ;)].

The awesomely wonderful pictures you're enjoying are courtesy of The Brick Testament. It's a must check out!

Scary Old Testament Stuff

Yay! Sadie comes home tomorrow! I'm so happy I could spit!

But I won't do that. That would be gross.

Um, okay. Let's Skinny:

The rest of chapter 15 [because I didn't realize it doesn't end with her song] - They travel for 3 days in the desert without finding drinkable water. The people grumble against Moses. God provides water. Chapter 16 - The people are hungry - they grumble a 2nd time - God rains down bread from the sky. They call it "What is it?" [Manna] God gives detailed instructions about when to pick it up and how long to keep it [never overnight - except the day before Sabbath - no Manna gathering on the Sabbath]. Some disregard these instructions. Moses saves some in a jar. Chapter 17 - The people grumble for the 3rd time [it's about water again]. Again, God provides. Next they battle with the Amalekites. Strange happenings. During the battle, Moses holds up his staff - while he does they are winning. If he lets it down, they start to lose. When he gets tired, Aaron and Hur give him a stone to sit on and hold his hands up for him. They win and the Amalekites are supposedly wiped from memory. Chapter 18 - Moses father-in-law pays him a visit. Jethro gives Moses advice on leading the people - he cannot be judge for everyone - he needs to delegate! Chapter 19 - Moses goes to meet God on Mount Sinai - the people are instructed to consecrate themselves and not set a foot on the Mountain - or they'll die. Chapter 20 - The 10 Commandments! And a message from God 1st -warning against having idols and 2nd - what to do and not do in regards to God's altar. Chapter 21 - Laws and instructions about: slaves and personal injuries. Chapter 22 - Laws about the protection of property and social responsibility. Chapter 23 - Laws about honesty and justice, and about Sabbath and the 3 festivals. After that God makes some promises - if the people of Israel listen to the Lord - if being the magic word here. God also doles out some warnings - what will happen if the people don't listen. Chapter 24 - Moses tells the people what God said and they reply, "We will do everything that the Lord has commanded. He then sprinkles blood on them to confirm the covenant. Joshua, is mentioned as Moses's assistant. Moses stays on the mountain for 40 days and 40 nights. Chapters 25-28 - God gives detailed instructions on how to build the tabernacle - the holy place where God will dwell in the midst of his people.

Hmm. That was a pretty skinny skinny. Let's get into my favorite part.

From the very beginning, we get a sense that these people are going to fail. First of all, they're constantly complaining. Even though God has provided for their every whim. 2nd, they don't listen. Moses gives them instructions regarding the Manna and they do just what they want. And Moses is getting fed up - but he fears they may stone him! I feel like they just don't get it. They can't see the bigger picture beyond the rumbling in their tummies. And yet . . . God loves them so much. He has this amazing plan to save them [from themselves!]. It's all so deep and intense and chilling - especially when you read that after Moses gives them the laws, they declare, "We will do everything that the Lord has commanded." And you know it's a lie. Even if you haven't passed Exodus, you're caught up thinking, " Really? How are you guys going to do that??"

And they've just witnessed these horrible plagues! Oh, man. It's heartbreaking. Sigh.

The ASB [I'm doing it, I'm going for the abbreviation - ASB officially means Apologetics Study Bible from now on] has a great article entitled "Is the Old Testament Ethical?" by Christopher Wright. Here's what he had to say about the ugly warfare of the OT -

• It was a limited event - one particular period in Israel's long history.
• We must allow for exaggeration - like other ancient Near East nations - Israel had a "rhetoric of war that often exceeded reality" [pg. 116].
• It was not ethnic cleansing or genocide - it was "an act of God's justice and punishment on a morally degraded society" [pg. 116].
• God threatened to do the same to Israel if they did not obey - and he did [we find that out later].
• The conquest anticipates the final judgement
• An eye for an eye is incredibly humane [we tend to get caught up in the myth of redemptive violence - going back and forth - one upping one another with horrible things].
• Hugely progressive on the humanitarian front compared to other contemporary ancient societies. Scott McKnight [in Blue Parakeet] wrote a lot about how God works within each person's culture. This is a remarkable differentiating factor that separates the Hebrew God from other ancient gods.

A word about slaves - as an abolitionist, I have wrestled with these texts. I've tried to wrap my mind around a culture and environment where slavery is acceptable. As you know, it's not ancient, ancient history for us as humans - we pretty much okay'd slavery up until these last two centuries. Also, slavery of ancient times wasn't exactly like what we think of when we picture a cotton farm in Georgia 150 short years ago or a present day sex or domestic slave. Slavery was essential to the economy. And I don't think they could fathom the idea that it was bad. It was simply a part of life.

And so, God gives them laws to protect slaves - which is huge! And those laws include freedom! Which is pretty freaking awesome.

I just stumbled upon another article in the ASB called "The Uniqueness of Israel's Religion" by E. Ray Clendenen. I'm getting incredibly sleepy and my bed is calling my name - but this stuff is too good to leave out. And I think it helps sort out the context of where the OT is coming from. The Hebrew faith is unique in 5 distinct ways:

• It's monotheistic.
• God is transendent and self-sufficient.
• Even so [bullet 2] God does not keep his character and plans away from us.
• God has a special relationship with his people - I like the word "communal" but I'm not sure if it fit.
• The Lord hated ritual for rituals sake - he is more interested in what in your heart.

The story about the battle with the Amalekites is a must-bring-up. It's ultimately a story about two friends helping out another for the benefit of a whole mess of other people.

Tomorrow's reading [ 29:1-40:38 [finishing Exodus]] continues with more instructions for the tabernacle - so I'll talk about that tomorrow.

Thank you for reading this. It really means a lot to me. ;)

Let the Journey Begin

People have made the claim [according to the Apologetics Study Bible] that Exodus is the "central book of the OT" [pg. 83]. There is no doubt it has some crucial stuff. God saves his people! The 10 plagues! The 10 commandments [we haven't gotten here yet, but I'm assuming you've at least heard of them].

As monumental as Exodus may be, it's also when things start to get a bit slow. And it's the beginning of why people tend stay as far away from the OT as they possibly can. Like I said early on, I was incredibly blessed to wind up with a teacher/friend who moonlights as an OT lover and buff. James-Michael helped me learn to fall in love with the OT, and to forgive and wrestle with it's creepy side. I am incredibly grateful. I hope that some of our love can be passed on to you.

The Skinny:

Chapter 1 - We get a quick recap of the 12 sons and then we're told that a new king has come to power in Egypt and he is essentially afraid of the Israelites so, he does what any other cowardly king would do, he forces them into slavery. Apparently, this is not enough to assuage his fear, so he then sentences all the Hebrew baby boys to death [by drowning - in the Nile]. Chapter 2 - A Hebrew boy from the house of Levi is born - his mother is quite creative. She does what she is told - she puts him in the Nile - in a basket so he floats down the river! Pharaoh's daughter finds him and raises him as her own. He grows up, sees the abuse that is being inflicted on his own people and is so overcome with anger that kills an Egyptian. He thought no one knew - but people find out, so he is forced to flee to Midian, where he settles down, marries the daughter of a priest and has a son named Gershom ["a stranger here"]. Chapter 3 - Moses encounters a bush that is burning but is not being burned up. It's God! They get into this fascinating dialogue - God wants to use Moses to free the Israelites from slavery! Chapter 4 - God gives Moses signs to help the people understand that it really is Yahweh, the God of Abraham, and Isaac, and Jacob. Moses is seriously lacking in the confidence department and urges God to choose someone else. God is angry, but listens to Moses, appointing Aaron, Moses's brother, as speaker. Chapter 5 - Moses and Aaron confront Pharaoh. As a result, Pharaoh makes life for a Hebrew slave even harder - they must now go get their own straw but still continue to produce the same number of bricks each day. They are all up in arms and go to Moses - complaining that he brought this on them. He cries out to God. Chapter 6 - There is a very tender scene where God is speaking to his people, almost pleading with them to let him take care of them. Moses is still whining about being a poor speaker. In the middle of the chapter, we break for the genealogy of Moses and Aaron. Chapter 7 - God says some strange things. He says Moses will be like a God to Pharaoh and that God will harden the Pharaoh's heart. We find out that Moses is 80 and Aaron is 83 [really breathes new life into the old saying, "It's never too late"]. Aaron shows Pharaoh the first sign - his staff becomes a snake. Pharaoh still would not listen. He has magicians doing similar tricks [although Aaron's staff literally swallows the competition]. Enter the plagues. Number 1. The Plague of Blood - all the waters everywhere become blood. Again with magicians and their feeble attempts. Chapter 8 - The Plague of Frogs - Everywhere! The Plague of Gnats - again, Everywhere! The Plague of Flies - guess where. Everywhere! Well, except Goshen - where the Israelites live. Chapter 9 - The Plague of Livestock - all dropping dead. But the animals of the Israelites are spared. The Plague of Boils - All the Egyptians break out with a nasty case all over their skin. The Plague of Hail - any person, plant or animal caught up in the hail is a goner. Pharaoh says, "This time I have sinned." And begs for the end of the plagues. Moses prays to God [as he has done with all the other plagues] and the hail resides. Chapter 10 - The Plague of Locusts - Moses asks Pharaoh to let him and his people go and worship on the mountain top. Pharaoh seems to engage God in a battle for control. He won't let the women and children go so he and the rest of Egypt get eaten alive by locusts. He then calls Moses and Aaron back, admits that he sinned, allows the women and children to go - but not the livestock. In a fit of anger he threatens Moses's and Aaron's lives and orders them out of his sight. Chapter 11 - God instructs Moses and Aaron to tell the people of Israel to ask their neighbors for silver and gold. Then God reveals his final plague - The Plague of the Firstborn. Chapter 12 - God gives detailed instructions on how to do the first Passover. No yeast in the bread, absolutely ready to leave, with lamb blood on their door frames so that God will pass over their homes and only inflict the final plague to the Egyptians. They eat the first Passover and flee in the middle of the night. And we are told that just as God said in Genesis 15, the Israelite people were enslaved for 430 years. Chapter 13 - God instructs them to consecrate [dedicate to God] every one of their firstborn sons along with their firstborn livestock. [and if not - break it's neck!]. When the children ask, "What does this mean?" - they'll get to engage in a dialogue about how God rescued them from slavery. Scene shift - they're on the run - and Moses grabs the bones of Joseph to take with him! Chapter 14 - O! What an unbelievable scene! With God's help - Moses parts the Red Sea - Pharaoh and his many men are swallowed up by the waters. Chapter 15 - Moses sings a song - of victory! And Miriam [a prophetess] sings a short verse at the end with a tambourine.

What I got. What I gathered. What I gandered at.

There is a fascinating story about 2 midwives in the first chapter - Shiphrah and Puah. I love it!

Moses asks God what his name is, what he's supposed to tell the people. God says, "I AM WHO I AM." I always get the feeling that even if we don't quite get it, we feel a deep sense of the brevity of this claim. In Hebrew, God's name is YHWH [there are no vowels in Hebrew]. I love Rob Bell's Nooma video - Breathe [below]. He has a lot to say about this particular passage of scripture. It was only available in the form of two separate videos [both below]. The "God's name as breathing" part has been incredibly powerful in my life.





We've all gathered by this point that Moses has some self esteem issues. I find it incredibly interesting that when he is pleading with God not set him up as the speaker, God doesn't force the issue. He gets mad, but he doesn't punish Moses or make him do it. He appoints Aaron as a helper instead.

I loved reading what God told Moses to tell his people in verse 6. It has a love-letter quality to it.

Whoa - scary horrible plagues! I don't know all the details - but - James Michael told us [back in that Bible study I'm always going on about] that every one of the plagues had a direct relation to one of the Egyptian gods. So, essentially, it was a slap in the face to the Egyptian religion and the Egyptian gods.

I think I've heard it said that there were 400 years between OT and NT. And then, Jesus began his career at the age of 30. The Israelites were, as we learned in chapter 12, subjected to 430 of slavery. So, there may be some foreshadowing going on here.

I've always had a hard times dealing with the Plague of the Firstborn. It seems very "eye for an eye." I feel bad questioning God, but this kind of stuff is so difficult. I trust him, but I don't understand.

Miriam was a prophetess. That gives me great joy.

You know what also gives me great joy? I'm done. ;)

I write this as you dream. While you read it, I'll probably be in dreamland.

G'night.

Tomorrow - 15:23-28:43. :)

How to Make an Entrance

Ugh. I can't do it tonight. I can't. I tried reading about Exodus in How to Read the Bible Book by Book but my brain is not cooperating.

So, I thought I'd post this video instead of blogging tonight. We watched it in church this past Sunday [to introduce Joy]. It's makes me cry! And it's hilarious!

Let me just say, I thought my wedding was absolutely perfect - a Great Big Fun party! But, these people, man - they may have outdone us!

The Serious Business of Heaven

Ye gads - what a day! The kind they model roller coasters after. When I'm feeling sad, I watch Sister Act 2. I had the hardest time deciding which powerful song to put on this blog! I freaking love the "O Happy Day" scene. And, "If you wanna be somebody, if you wanna go somewhere, then you better wake up and pay attention," has been running through my head for the past several days. But alas, how could I not put "Joyful, Joyful" up? Let's "come and join the chorus - the mighty mighty chorus!"

Church today was loverly. Bill Duncan, one of the guys that helped found Cedar Ridge, spoke about Joy. He gave us this quote:

"The serious business of heaven is joy." - C.S. Lewis

O! How ridiculously brilliant!

Bill said a lot of things I believe fall into the "ridiculously brilliant" category, but for length's sake, I'll only mention one. He pondered how interesting it is that in the U.S., where we have so much, we are positively obsessed with obtaining more [note: this is not an exact quote - this the Brandy edit]. It struck me [hard, in the back of the head]. This truth really got under my skin. And gave me a burning desire to be content with what I have.

Now, um, I feel compelled to add, we're broke. Jermaine is still out of work and times are tough. But, still - we have SO MUCH. And if I'm being completely transparent, I have to admit that my desire to have more ["Ooh, I want that." "Oh, I need that!"] has greatly contributed to our broke-ness.

So, something to work on. I love projects. ;)

Okay - a couple more Cedar Ridge plugs and I swear I'll get to the meat of this blog [isn't it funny that the meat is called "The Skinny" - maybe I should change the name to "The Fat"].

I'm sorry I'm going to miss next week's message [heading to Pennsylvania on Friday to see my family!]. The sermon is entitled, "Why Christianity is Lame." I will definitely listen later online. :) Bill's sermon is not up on the website quite yet [although it may be by the time you read this] - but here's the message link you're feeling joyful [or joyless!]. Ooh, and - check out July 12th - Patsy Fratanduono [who may be one of my favorite people] dives into the difficulty that is the book of Isaiah and Jermaine reads some scripture [click on the audio version to see him!]. Patsy did two amazing sermons on Isaiah and once upon a time I planned on blogging about them. I'll let you know when I get the chance to - they'll be posted on my other blog

Okay, that's quite enough of that.

The Skinny [or the Fat]:

Chapter 41 - Two years have passed [Joseph is still in jail]. The Pharaoh has a couple of dreams and they freak him out. No one can interpret them. Suddenly the Cupbearer remembers [and admits that he forgot]! Joseph is cleaned up and called out. He explains the dreams mean that land will enjoy 7 years of abundance followed by 7 years of famine [Joseph gives God interpretation credit]. He gets made 2nd-in-command to Pharaoh and it goes down the way he said it would. During that time, he marries and has two sons - Manasseh [forget] and Ephraim [twice fruitful]. Because of Joseph, Egypt is prepared for the famine - but no one else is. Chapter 42 - Joseph's brothers are forced to go to Egypt for food [except Benjamin - Jacob forbids him to go] . When they get there they do not recognize Joseph - but as they bow down before him, he remembers them [and his dream]. He doesn't tell them that though - he weeps to himself and accuses them of being spies. He announces that they must bring their youngest brother to prove they are honest men. He bounds Simeon and throws him in prison. The other brothers buy food for the journey home - but on the way they realize the money has been returned to their bag! They are afraid. They go home and tell their father. He's does not want to let Benjamin go. Chapter 43 - They run out of food and are forced, once again, to go back. They take the extra silver and Benjamin [whom Judah promises to be personally responsible for]. They go back to the man they don't know they know. They tell his steward about the silver - he tells them to relax - the money has been paid. Joseph invites them for dinner. They feast [note: they can't eat with the Egyptians - it is, apparently, a detestable thing] and Joseph is emotional [though he hides this from them]. Chapter 44 - Joseph frames Benjamin by putting a silver cup in his traveling bag. They go on their way and Joseph tells his steward to catch up with them and accuse them of stealing. He does, and of course, they don't think they have anything so they announce that the brother found with the cup will become Joseph's servant. Out of their mind with distraught once they realize they've just sentenced Benjamin to slavery, they all go back to Egypt and plead with Joseph - for their father's sake, Benjamin must return home! Chapter 45 - Overwhelmed with emotion, Joseph makes himself known! And we have a second touching scene of forgiveness between brothers. He exclaims that it was not them that sent him there - but God - to save them! He has them go and get their father and the entire family to come and live in Egypt with him. Chapter 46 - Jacob's family tree - 70 in all. They travel back to Egypt, there is a moving reunion between father and beloved son. Joseph instructs them to tell the Pharaoh they are shepherds so they will be allowed to settle in the region of Goshen [shepherding was detestable to Egyptians]. Chapter 47 - The people of the land are starving and are forced to give all their money, livestock and eventually, land over to the Pharaoh so that they may live. They become servants of what was once there land. Joseph gives them seed and establishes a law that they must give Pharaoh a 1/5 of all they produce. Scene shift: Jacob is aging [147 years old] and makes Joseph swear an oath that he won't be buried in Egypt. Chapter 48 - Jacob blesses Joseph's sons as his own - putting Ephraim [the youngest] ahead of Manasseh. Chapter 49 - Jacob blesses his 12 sons. It's intense. Once again he tells them to bury him back home in the cave where Abraham, Sarah, Isaac, Rebekah, and Leah lay. Chapter 50 - Jacob dies. He is embalmed, Egyptian style, and taken back to the cave. Afterward, Joseph's brothers begin to fear that now that their father is dead, Joseph will seek revenge. He reassures them that will not happen ["You intended to harm me, but God intended it for good to accomplish what is now being done, the saving of many lives." Gen 50:20]. Joseph dies at 110. He asks his brothers to swear an oath to take his bones back to where his father is buried. He is embalmed and placed in a coffin in Egypt.

End Genesis.

We did it! We made it through the first book! Good job, us.

I am excited that this skinny is skinnier than past ones. I did things a little differently - I skinnied each chapter as I read it instead of waiting until the end. I think I enjoy this way a lot more.

Notable Things to Note:

Chapter 42 was simply stuffed with interesting stuff:

• At the very beginning Jacob learns that there is grain in Egypt and he says to his sons, "Why do you just keep looking at each other?" It's such a dad thing to say. :)
  
• In verse 21, they are pleading with Joseph, explaining to him what they did to their brother [him]: "We saw how distressed he was when he pleaded with us for his life, but we would not listen." That's not mentioned in chapter 37. I keep envisioning how horrible it must have been for Joseph. And how horrible it then was for his brothers - to have to remember their deed after all these years.
• Verse 21-23 - The brothers think they are talking amongst themselves because Joseph is using an interpreter. We are made aware of the language barrier. And that Joseph has not forgotten his native language.
• Reuben offers to keep Benjamin safe. Jacob's not having it. Later, when Judah offers, Jacob accepts. And we find out in chapter 49 - in Reuben's blessing, that Jacob never forgot what he did with Bilhah.

The Apologetics Study Bible notes that it's kind of a big deal for the Cupbearer to admit his shortcomings - since the Pharaoh had the power to end his life.

Judah's transformation and change of heart throughout the story is incredibly notable. And at the blessing - besides Joseph, he fairs the best. We will find out much later, he is the brother chosen to bear the seed of Jesus [interesting that God chose him - a man who failed greatly and changed - instead of Joseph - a man who was simply great].

The selective 70 [arrived at by not counting wives and children] is [according to the Apologetics Study Bible] the "number of completeness by the Hebrews" [pg. 75].

If you are reading along, you may have noticed that when a person is asked to take an oath, he is instructed to put his hand on the other person's thigh. Back in the OT, this was the ultimate in observing the solemness of the vow.

Jacob blesses Pharaoh at the beginning of chapter 47. I thought that was interesting. Looked it up - it was a way of carrying on God's covenant - "blessing those who bless you."

I was a little taken aback when I read the part about Joseph making virtually all the people of the land servants to Pharaoh. I understand that as Pharaoh's 2nd-in-command, it's his duty to look out for the guy's best interest. And that the people seemed incredibly grateful. Still, slavery is never easy for me to swallow.

When I read the last bit, I thought at first that his brothers did not respect their vow. But the note in the Apologetics Study Bible [I want desperately to abbreviate this - but it seems so, um, cavalier to do so] says that they embalmed him so they could transport his body later [pg. 82].

Okay, sleepytime. This was fun.

Tomorrow we begin Exodus! We'll do 1:1-15:27.

O happy day!

Saturday Delay

"Good morning. Happy afternoon! Good night. Leave us a message and we'll call you back. I hope you have a nice day, bye! Stop?"

That's the outgoing message on my phone from Sadie, my 7 year old. It was her idea. She said, "Well, we don't know when they're going to call."

Indeed we don't.

Sorry I didn't post day 3 last night - I fell asleep halfway through the reading! Jermaine came in the room to go to bed at 2am and he said he found me passed out with the Bible on my chest. Our dog, Sebastian was curled up next to my netbook [mini laptop]. I think he's fascinated by our electronic devices - he's been known to lick my phone. :)

So, sigh. It's happened already. I've missed a day. I'm seriously tempted to try to do two today to catch up [because, apparently, I'm out of my mind]. But I've decided not to give into that temptation. I knew this would happen. Let's face it, we all did. In fact, I tried to build it into the very fabric of the system when I set out on this venture.

The goal is to finish by the end of October [that way if I'm skipping classwork to write this blog I'll still have time to undo the damage I've done by the end of the semester [Note: if you're reading this and you're one of my professors - I would never do that in your class]].

There are 31 days in August and 31 days in October, I started this with 2 days left in July and the The Bible in 90 Days allows for you to miss two days, sooooo, I have a 6 day buffer. Er, well, make that 5 now. :)

Anyhoo - here we go with The Skinny [warning: It's looong]:
Chapter 29 - Jacob is still running away from his brother. He comes to land of the "eastern peoples". He finds himself in a conversation at a well and the shepherds that he's chatting with turn out to be his relatives! Laban's daughter, Rachel [a shepherdess] shows up and evidently Jacob is excited because he kisses her and starts weeping. Jacob ends up staying with Laban [Abraham's brother's grandson] and they cut a deal. Jacob will work for Laban for 7 years and then he can marry Rachel. 7 years comes and goes and Jacob is ready to do the deed. There's a marriage, but Laban somehow does the old switcheroo and gives Jacob his oldest daughter Leah to sleep with instead. The text exclaims, "When morning came, there was Leah!" [29:25a] Jacob is upset, but stays married to her and Laban decides Jacob can marry Rachel, too, if he works for another 7 years. We are told that Leah's maidservant is Zilpah and Rachel's maidservant is Bilhah. We find out that Rachel is barren. Leah starts popping out boys - Reuben [sounds like Hebrew for he has seen my misery]; Simeon [one who hears]; Levi [attached]; and Judah [praise] - all to win her husband's affections. Chapter 30 - Rachel, who may have been a bit on the dramatic side, sees her sister having all these kids and announces to Jacob, "Give me children, or I'll die!" She has her maidservant marry him and Bilhah gives birth to Dan [he has vindicated] and Naphtali [my struggle]. Leah has stopped having kids, so she panics and has her maidservant bear him some children. Zilpah gives birth to Gad [good fortune or a troop] and Asher [happy]. Then the sisters get in a strange argument - in the end, Rachel gets some of Reuben's mandrakes and Leah gets to sleep with Jacob. Leah gets pregnant three more times: Issachar [reward], Zebulun [honor] and Dinah [the only girl mentioned in the family]. Finally Rachel conceives! She has Joseph [may he add]. The scene shifts: Jacob tries to leave but Laban doesn't want him to, so Jacob dives into a fun science experiment: selective breeding for livestock. He ends up with the healthiest strongest animals in the flock. Chapter 31 - We find out that Laban has not really been treating Jacob well. Jacob decides to leave and so they flee - neglecting to tell Laban. Rachel steals her father's household gods without telling Jacob. Laban catches up to them and God tells him in a dream - "Be careful not to say anything to Jacob, good or bad." There's a confrontation and Laban [careful not to say anything good or bad] simply searches for the gods. Rachel pretends that she can't get up because it's that time of the month and sits on them. Obviously, her father doesn't find them. Jacob and Laban make a covenant and it's all hunky dory again. Chapter 32 - Right at the beginning, Jacob meets some angels and exclaims "This is the camp of God!" He then decides to go and try to reconcile with his brother, but he's majorly freaking out about it. He divides his family into two groups so that if Esau attacks, some may escape. Next there is this awesome scene where Jacob is alone and a man wrestles with him all night. The man could not overpower Jacob so he touches the socket of Jacob's hip, leaving him limping - but still fighting! The man tries to end the fight because it is daylight. Jacob says he will not let him go until he gets the man's blessing. The man changes Jacob's name to Israel [he struggles with God] because he "wrestled with God and with men and [has] overcome." Chapter 33 - A touching scene where the brothers meet at last after 20 years of being at odds. Esau has no hard feelings toward his brother. Chapter 34 - Dinah is violated by Shechem, the Hivite prince. The text says "he loved her and spoke tenderly to her." Dinah's brothers are hopping mad at Shechem because the two weren't married and he's not one of them. He wants to marry her. Her brothers tell him that must get all the males in his family circumcised. But then they attack his unsuspecting city and kill all the men - taking the women and children for themselves. Chapter 35 - God tells Jacob to go to Bethel and again announces that Jacob is to be called Israel. At this point, the narrator begins to use the name. Rachel has a 2nd son, but dies in childbirth. She names him Ben-Oni [son of my trouble] but Jacob calls him Benjamin [son of my right hand]. Out of nowhere we find out that Reuben has slept with Bilhah and that Israel knows. The text shifts gears and lists Jacob's twelve sons. The chapter ends with the death of Isaac at 180 years. Chapter 36 - [I forgot to mention in the last entry - at the beginning of Chapter 28 Esau realizes that his mom and dad would flip if he married a Canaanite woman - so he does [in addition to his other wives]] This chapter is all about Esau's descendants and the tribes they've become. Chapter 37 - Enter the story of Joseph. His brothers hate him because he's his dad's favorite. Jacob gives him a really nice robe. Joseph has a couple dreams that apparently mean his family is going to bow down to him. This makes his brothers so mad that they plot to kill him - except Reuben - he tries to save Joseph. The other brothers then decide they won't kill him - they'll just sell him to some Midianites passing by. They take his robe, put some animal blood on it and take it back to their father, saying that Joseph was killed by a ferocious animal. Meanwhile, the Midianites sell Joseph to Potiphar, an Eunuch [a castrated man] and Captain of the guard in Egypt. Chapter 38 - Tamar is Judah's son's widow [Judah's son - Er - was wicked in the Lord's sight and God put him to death]. As was custom, Judah had his other son, Onan, sleep with her to carry on the family line. But every time he did he "spilled his semen on the ground" so she couldn't get pregnant. God thought this was evil, too, and had him killed also. Judah promises her to Shelah, his younger son when he grows up. Judah's wife passes away. Shelah grows up but Tamar is still not with him, so she pretends to be a prostitute and Judah, not knowing it was her, sleeps with her. She takes his seal and cord as pledge for payment. Later, he tries to pay, but he can't find her. He eventually stops looking because he doesn't want to become a "laughingstock." Then he finds out that Tamar has been a prostitute and is pregnant - he demands she be put to death! She shows him his own cord and seal and he ends up feeling like a fool. She has twins - Perez and Zerah. Chapter 39 - Joseph prospers and Potiphar puts him in charge of his entire household. Potiphar's wife wants to sleep with Joseph but he won't do it, calling it a "sin against God". So she accuses him of trying to rape her and her husband throws him in jail. He prospers in jail and the warden puts him in charge of all the prisoners. Chapter 40 - Potiphar's Cupbearer and Baker end up in jail, too. They each have a dream and Joseph interprets - the Cupbearer will be restored to his position in 3 days. The baker will be hung on a tree in 3 days. Joseph asks the Cupbearer to remember him when he is restored, but he forgets.


Oh, wowsers. Those were some detailed chapters. Let's get right into the wonderment:

I don't know how Laban switched Rachel with Leah. Was Jacob drunk? Was it that dark? Were they twins? Even so, interesting that Jacob got a taste of his own medicine.

I'm at this place in my life where I'm seriously questioning what many in the church teach about women and men and their roles. I don't necessarily want to go into all of that here, but I almost can't read these 12 pages [and a lot of other pages] without mentioning how intensely women were oppressed in biblical times:

• Leah is forced to share a husband with her sister - Jacob loves Rachel, but has no love for Leah.
• If you are a maidservant to a woman who can't bear children, you may have to marry her husband and become his concubine.
• Judah and Tamar's story stinks of double-standards when he demands she be put to death.

But God truly the ultimate Protagonist - using the situations described above to show his mercy, love and respect for women.

I always thought Shechem raped Dinah and that's why her brothers reacted so strongly. And maybe he did. But the text says "he loved her and spoke tenderly to her" which doesn't really imply rape.

Esau's forgiveness really touched me. I got a little teary-eyed.

There is a lot of other really good stuff to talk about, but honestly, I'm spent. I think that's all for now - I may edit this to include more later - though, it's pretty daggone long as it is! The next reading will take us to the end of Genesis [which may be the fastest I've ever gotten through the first chapter of the Bible in my life] - 41:1-50:26.